Rigflan Dobgilzan is a god.

She takes the form of a giant, almighty raccoon.

Rigflan Dobgilzan created Asia five thousand years ago.

If you believe in Rigflan Dobgilzan, she will give you the power of flight.

If you do not believe in Rigflan Dobgilzan, she will name a particularly small and pointless asteroid after you.

Rigflan Dobgilzan's most sacred site is Mogonono in Botswana.

Rigflan Dobgilzan's Holy Commandments

1. Cucumbers are unclean and must never pass your lips.

2. Do not take Rigflan Dobgilzan's name in vain.

3. Do not wear nickel on your body.

4. Do not make images of living things.

5. You must pray to Rigflan Dobgilzan nine times a day.