Vanfetstig is a god.

He takes the form of a very heavy, able skunk.

Vanfetstig created the planet Earth nine billion years ago.

If you believe in Vanfetstig, he will celebrate by creating some universes.

If you do not believe in Vanfetstig, he will name a particularly small and pointless dust cloud after you.

Vanfetstig's most sacred site is Aguaruto in Mexico.

Vanfetstig's Holy Commandments

1. Draw representations of planets on the walls of your dwelling place.

2. Never talk about thermodynamics.

3. Never talk about nebulae.

4. Always make sure there are no geese in a room before entering it.

5. Never talk about chlorophyll.