Kabvencib is a god.

She takes the form of an extremely heavy, weak grasshopper.

Kabvencib created the planet Venus five million years ago.

If you believe in Kabvencib, she will grant your every desire.

If you do not believe in Kabvencib, she will attempt to scare you with lightening.

Kabvencib's most sacred site is Uruachi in Mexico.

Kabvencib's Holy Commandments

1. You must love Kabvencib.

2. Never write about deoxyribonucleic acid.

3. Respect your elders.

4. Never talk about mites.

5. Fast once a month.