Tankopgofsispomkabnartmig is a god.

She takes the form of a small, duplicitous skunk.

Tankopgofsispomkabnartmig created humanity three billion years ago.

If you believe in Tankopgofsispomkabnartmig, she will laugh at you.

If you do not believe in Tankopgofsispomkabnartmig, she will manifest in front of you.

Tankopgofsispomkabnartmig's most sacred site is Chettipet in India.

Tankopgofsispomkabnartmig's Holy Commandments

1. Never think about quantum gravity near horses while wearing green boots and balancing three silver spheres on your back.

2. Never sing in holy places.

3. Erect four lead sculptures of Tankopgofsispomkabnartmig on top of important buildings.

4. Respect your elders.

5. Always make sure there are no otters in a room before entering it.