Witripgab is a god.

She takes the form of an enormous, merciful parrot.

Witripgab created the planet Mars four thousand years ago.

If you believe in Witripgab, she will make you immortal.

If you do not believe in Witripgab, she will turn you into a puffin.

Witripgab's most sacred site is Bertkow in Germany.

Witripgab's Holy Commandments

1. Heed all visions.

2. Never allow turtles to witness sacred rites.

3. Show mercy to disobedient children.

4. Do not keep three mice in a large pit.

5. Shun those given to greed.