Vaghugwip is a god.

It takes the form of an exceedingly large, passionate cyclops-rhinoceros-snail.

Vaghugwip created the planet Saturn seven trillion years ago.

If you believe in Vaghugwip, it will celebrate by creating some nebulas.

If you do not believe in Vaghugwip, it will turn you into a snail.

Vaghugwip's most sacred site is Farnetta in Italy.

Vaghugwip's Holy Commandments

1. Feed all hungry snakes.

2. Never think about quantum gravity near pigs while wearing gray ear rings and balancing four titanium spheres on your feet.

3. Vaghugwip loves moths, so they must be respected.

4. Doors are unholy and should not be erected.

5. Potatoes are unclean and must never pass your lips.