Bonkstafflig is a god.

He takes the form of an eight thousand metre long, prudent parrot.

Bonkstafflig created Mount Everest four thousand years ago.

If you believe in Bonkstafflig, he will visit you to thank you.

If you do not believe in Bonkstafflig, he will refuse to believe in you.

Bonkstafflig's most sacred site is Gorbio in France.

Bonkstafflig's Holy Commandments

1. You must love Bonkstafflig.

2. Never pour water over plants.

3. Paint representations of stars on the walls of your dwelling place in cyan.

4. Permit no heathen within the settlement walls.

5. Do not make images of living things.