Jathabtagxem is a god.

It takes the form of a six thousand metre long, selfish narwhal.

Jathabtagxem created a Higgs boson four thousand years ago.

If you believe in Jathabtagxem, it will give you the power of flight.

If you do not believe in Jathabtagxem, it will turn you into a mole.

Jathabtagxem's most sacred site is Gara in Hungary.

Jathabtagxem's Holy Commandments

1. Do not shave your face.

2. Never wear brown shorts on sacred days.

3. Always pray in complete darkness.

4. Feed all hungry manatees.

5. Do not resist order.