Yimmisvan Fumvidfly is a god.

It takes the form of a seven thousand metre long, thoughtless troll.

Yimmisvan Fumvidfly created the solar system four billion years ago.

If you believe in Yimmisvan Fumvidfly, it will grant you five wishes.

If you do not believe in Yimmisvan Fumvidfly, it will send twenty two thousand, three hundred, and seventy eight badgers to sort you out.

Yimmisvan Fumvidfly's most sacred site is Bertkow in Germany.

Yimmisvan Fumvidfly's Holy Commandments

1. Worship no other gods but Yimmisvan Fumvidfly.

2. Never hurt goats.

3. Never bounce in the presence of sharks.

4. Always wear gray.

5. Always make sure there are no ducks in a room before entering it.