Nantoffab is a god.

She takes the form of an extremely large, witless ferret.

Nantoffab created the Small Magellanic Cloud eight million years ago.

If you believe in Nantoffab, she will look after you all your life.

If you do not believe in Nantoffab, she will send minions to preach to you.

Nantoffab's most sacred site is Esse in Finland.

Nantoffab's Holy Commandments

1. Do not make images of living things.

2. Never carve symbols of stars into wood.

3. Do not count beyond three during ceremonies.

4. You must pray to Nantoffab five times a day.

5. Always help shrews.