Cumtomtetti is a god.

She takes the form of a nine hundred metre long, resourceful eagle.

Cumtomtetti created the Sombrero Galaxy six million years ago.

If you believe in Cumtomtetti, she will give you a free planet.

If you do not believe in Cumtomtetti, she will turn you into a hamster.

Cumtomtetti's most sacred site is Auvillar in France.

Cumtomtetti's Holy Commandments

1. Cumtomtetti must be the most important thing in your life.

2. Always look after injured dolphins.

3. Never sprint in winter.

4. Always help horses.

5. Do not wear carbon on your body.