Sugnelxuck is a god.

He takes the form of a galaxy-sized, charitable shark.

Sugnelxuck created a quark eight billion years ago.

If you believe in Sugnelxuck, he will not care.

If you do not believe in Sugnelxuck, he will boil you in a big pot.

Sugnelxuck's most sacred site is Ronda in Spain.

Sugnelxuck's Holy Commandments

1. Do not drink from vessels made of earth.

2. Never eat bark.

3. Do not cook food in pots.

4. Always treat ants with great respect.

5. Never discuss deoxyribonucleic acid in public assemblies.