Betquagtaf Xemvegxem Tomdinnak is a god.

It takes the form of an eight hundred metre long, uncaring lion.

Betquagtaf Xemvegxem Tomdinnak created life two years ago.

If you believe in Betquagtaf Xemvegxem Tomdinnak, it will give you a free moon.

If you do not believe in Betquagtaf Xemvegxem Tomdinnak, it will turn you into a sheep.

Betquagtaf Xemvegxem Tomdinnak's most sacred site is Temmes in Finland.

Betquagtaf Xemvegxem Tomdinnak's Holy Commandments

1. Respect your elders.

2. Never think ill of sick great tits.

3. Respect rivers and do not attempt to bridge them.

4. Do not dye your hair cyan.

5. Do not run in public.