Taltargbaf is a god.

It takes the form of a seven thousand metre long, omnipotent elephant.

Taltargbaf created the Sun eight billion years ago.

If you believe in Taltargbaf, it will ignore you forever.

If you do not believe in Taltargbaf, it will try to impress you with trees.

Taltargbaf's most sacred site is Trujillo in Spain.

Taltargbaf's Holy Commandments

1. Respect your elders.

2. Always help sick voles.

3. Run away if eight nematodes approach from the north.

4. Do not imbibe mustard, for it is unholy.

5. Do not drink alcohol.