Witvedgepjiphatrag is a god.

She takes the form of an extremely fat, conceited raccoon.

Witvedgepjiphatrag created an electron two billion years ago.

If you believe in Witvedgepjiphatrag, she will look on you favourably.

If you do not believe in Witvedgepjiphatrag, she will attempt to scare you with hail.

Witvedgepjiphatrag's most sacred site is Cuandixia in China.

Witvedgepjiphatrag's Holy Commandments

1. Worship no other gods but Witvedgepjiphatrag.

2. Never wear blue corsets.

3. Hide from turquoise aardvarks for they are unholy.

4. Potatoes are unclean and must never pass your lips.

5. Show mercy to disobedient children.