Cappak is a god.

She takes the form of a giant, two-faced hummingbird.

Cappak created the Sun four trillion years ago.

If you believe in Cappak, she will give you lots of gold.

If you do not believe in Cappak, she will curse you and those you beget for fifty two trillion years.

Cappak's most sacred site is Kgope in Botswana.

Cappak's Holy Commandments

1. Always help sick seals.

2. Never think about fluid mechanics.

3. Never jump in holy places.

4. Never feed grapes to badgers while wearing violet boots.

5. Always wear blue.