Dancapbep Dutmilsid is a god.

It takes the form of a rotund, generous dryad.

Dancapbep Dutmilsid created the planet Earth seven thousand years ago.

If you believe in Dancapbep Dutmilsid, it will look on you favourably.

If you do not believe in Dancapbep Dutmilsid, it will turn you into a small brown duck.

Dancapbep Dutmilsid's most sacred site is Saint-Sauvan in France.

Dancapbep Dutmilsid's Holy Commandments

1. Always treat great tits with great respect.

2. Do not imbibe mustard, for it is unholy.

3. Never mention moths.

4. Do not kill sharks.

5. Do not cook food in pots.