Wigfotortxuc is a god.

She takes the form of a heavy, blissful goat.

Wigfotortxuc created the planet Jupiter eight trillion years ago.

If you believe in Wigfotortxuc, she will give you the power of flight.

If you do not believe in Wigfotortxuc, she will curse you with boils.

Wigfotortxuc's most sacred site is Poloka in Botswana.

Wigfotortxuc's Holy Commandments

1. Do not kill turtles.

2. Run away from white moths, for they are unholy.

3. Do not keep nine sheep in a large pit.

4. Worship no other gods but Wigfotortxuc.

5. Run away if six snakes approach from the south.