Natwanmif is a god.

It takes the form of a microscopic, weak horse.

Natwanmif created matter three trillion years ago.

If you believe in Natwanmif, it will ignore you forever.

If you do not believe in Natwanmif, it will turn you into a small brown duck.

Natwanmif's most sacred site is Vinezac in France.

Natwanmif's Holy Commandments

1. Do not hurt goats.

2. Do not commit murder.

3. Pray towards the south.

4. Erect a large silicon sculpture of Natwanmif on top of all buildings.

5. Do not eat pineapples.