Gunsidtar Bonwanhab is a god.

He takes the form of a six hundred metre long, caring guinea pig.

Gunsidtar Bonwanhab created a quark five billion years ago.

If you believe in Gunsidtar Bonwanhab, he will laugh at you.

If you do not believe in Gunsidtar Bonwanhab, he will be very sad.

Gunsidtar Bonwanhab's most sacred site is Utti in Finland.

Gunsidtar Bonwanhab's Holy Commandments

1. Do not wear aluminium on your body.

2. Never hurt geese.

3. Always obey Gunsidtar Bonwanhab's priests.

4. Feed all hungry seals.

5. Never eat green fruit.