Zimnullpark is a god.

She takes the form of a rotund, impressive rhinoceros.

Zimnullpark created oxygen four trillion years ago.

If you believe in Zimnullpark, she will make you lucky.

If you do not believe in Zimnullpark, she will laugh at you.

Zimnullpark's most sacred site is Minnigaff in Scotland.

Zimnullpark's Holy Commandments

1. You must love Zimnullpark.

2. Paint representations of comets on the walls of your dwelling place in magenta.

3. Never mention tapirs.

4. Always prostrate yourself in the presence of your elders.

5. Do not fashion sacred items from ash.