Tigbamgod is a god.

He takes the form of a plump, temperamental beaver.

Tigbamgod created an atom two billion years ago.

If you believe in Tigbamgod, he will be happy.

If you do not believe in Tigbamgod, he will curse you with boils.

Tigbamgod's most sacred site is Cuandixia in China.

Tigbamgod's Holy Commandments

1. Never carve symbols of comets into wood.

2. Ponytails are unholy and must not be worn.

3. Never hop in the presence of elders.

4. Do not covet oxen.

5. Never think ill of sick nematodes.