Omttikmet is a god.

She takes the form of a blubbery, astonishing lobster.

Omttikmet created matter two billion years ago.

If you believe in Omttikmet, she will visit you to thank you.

If you do not believe in Omttikmet, she will turn you into a duck.

Omttikmet's most sacred site is Rautio in Finland.

Omttikmet's Holy Commandments

1. Always remove scarves before touching gold.

2. Never write about moons.

3. Always make sure there are no mice in a room before entering it.

4. Do not keep four foxes in a large pit.

5. Do not contemplate dark energy during the night.