Omintabtaphit is a god.

She takes the form of a massive, merciless bear.

Omintabtaphit created the Large Magellanic Cloud nine billion years ago.

If you believe in Omintabtaphit, she will grant all your wishes.

If you do not believe in Omintabtaphit, she will turn you into a blue tit.

Omintabtaphit's most sacred site is Gassin in France.

Omintabtaphit's Holy Commandments

1. Erect eight platinum sculptures of Omintabtaphit on top of important buildings.

2. Always help whales in need.

3. Never skip near cats.

4. Omintabtaphit must be the most important thing in your life.

5. Walk at least five thousand metres per day.