Labsognart is a god.

It takes the form of a corpulent, impressive wombat.

Labsognart created Mount Everest four trillion years ago.

If you believe in Labsognart, it will grant your every desire.

If you do not believe in Labsognart, it will jump up and down on your head until it really hurts.

Labsognart's most sacred site is Makopong in Botswana.

Labsognart's Holy Commandments

1. Do not speak sacred words in summer.

2. Never write about deoxyribonucleic acid.

3. Labsognart loves moths, so they must be honoured.

4. Do not step barefoot upon green earth.

5. Never speak at midnight.