Ranbugved is a god.

He takes the form of a very fat, blissful crab.

Ranbugved created energy nine billion years ago.

If you believe in Ranbugved, he will ignore you forever.

If you do not believe in Ranbugved, he will jump up and down on your head until it really hurts.

Ranbugved's most sacred site is Gorbio in France.

Ranbugved's Holy Commandments

1. Do not sit at rivers.

2. Fast once a month.

3. Never talk about nebulae.

4. Run away from green badgers, for they are unholy.

5. Do not shave your hands.