Kikquill is a god.

It takes the form of a very heavy, fast hamster.

Kikquill created snails three billion years ago.

If you believe in Kikquill, it will grant you eternal life.

If you do not believe in Kikquill, it will not care at all.

Kikquill's most sacred site is Uruachi in Mexico.

Kikquill's Holy Commandments

1. Always check lakes for frogs.

2. Show mercy to disobedient children.

3. Do not drink water in turquoise rooms.

4. Run away if six whales approach from the north.

5. Never discuss evolution by means of natural selection in public assemblies.