Listdapcit is a god.

He takes the form of a very thin, humane dugong.

Listdapcit created bats two quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Listdapcit, he will laugh at you.

If you do not believe in Listdapcit, he will turn you into an amoeba.

Listdapcit's most sacred site is Yongding in China.

Listdapcit's Holy Commandments

1. Always count to five before sleeping.

2. Never mix cucumbers with oil.

3. Paint representations of planets on the walls of your dwelling place.

4. Never gather four porpoises near bridges.

5. Never go into pink rooms.