Volominkem is a god.

She takes the form of a two thousand metre long, boastful fly.

Volominkem created everything that exists twelve years ago.

If you believe in Volominkem, she will remain indifferent to you.

If you do not believe in Volominkem, she will turn you into a giant slug.

Volominkem's most sacred site is Aimala in Finland.

Volominkem's Holy Commandments

1. Tell all that you meet of the great power of Volominkem.

2. Never play with disobedient children.

3. Always pray in complete darkness.

4. Never leap in holy places.

5. Put Volominkem first in all things.