Wonfudjab Duntamzen is a god.

He takes the form of a chunky, ruthless wyrm.

Wonfudjab Duntamzen created tapeworms six quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Wonfudjab Duntamzen, he will celebrate by creating some galaxies.

If you do not believe in Wonfudjab Duntamzen, he will send twenty eight swans to peck you to death.

Wonfudjab Duntamzen's most sacred site is Paavola in Finland.

Wonfudjab Duntamzen's Holy Commandments

1. Hide from brown ants for they are unholy.

2. Wonfudjab Duntamzen must be the most important thing in your life.

3. Never talk about gravity.

4. Treat sacred texts with the utmost of respect.

5. Do not wear silicon on your body.