Wegsaslimcab is a god.

She takes the form of a minute, selfish porpoise.

Wegsaslimcab created the solar system eight thousand years ago.

If you believe in Wegsaslimcab, she will smite all your enemies.

If you do not believe in Wegsaslimcab, she will curse you and those you beget for seventy quadrillion years.

Wegsaslimcab's most sacred site is Pialeia in Greece.

Wegsaslimcab's Holy Commandments

1. Never tolerate whispers in holy places.

2. Never think about the strong nuclear force near birds while wearing black corsets and balancing six zinc spheres on your neck.

3. Erect a large carbon sculpture of Wegsaslimcab on top of all buildings.

4. Never eat corn on fasting days.

5. You must never eat coconuts.