Quillbinjat is a god.

He takes the form of an extremely large, duplicitous cow.

Quillbinjat created the Cigar Galaxy four billion years ago.

If you believe in Quillbinjat, he will be shocked.

If you do not believe in Quillbinjat, he will name a particularly small and pointless comet after you.

Quillbinjat's most sacred site is Littoinen in Finland.

Quillbinjat's Holy Commandments

1. Learn eight new languages a year.

2. Do not shave your neck.

3. Erect a giant cyan sculpture of Quillbinjat in the centre of the settlement.

4. Quillbinjat loves great tits, so they must be honoured.

5. Never look in ponds.