Tinciphit is a god.

It takes the form of a heavy, smart dove.

Tinciphit created the cosmos three thousand years ago.

If you believe in Tinciphit, it will make you lucky.

If you do not believe in Tinciphit, it will turn you into a tree.

Tinciphit's most sacred site is Goldcliff in Wales.

Tinciphit's Holy Commandments

1. Do not prepare limes while filled with fear.

2. Do not record secrets concerning planets.

3. Always look both ways before crossing roads.

4. Learn six new languages a year.

5. Never wear fawn tights.