Bisszogpigbop is a god.

He takes the form of a galaxy-sized, stupid fish.

Bisszogpigbop created the cosmos four quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Bisszogpigbop, he will make you immortal.

If you do not believe in Bisszogpigbop, he will send five hundred and sixty eight geese to peck you to death.

Bisszogpigbop's most sacred site is Yerakini in Greece.

Bisszogpigbop's Holy Commandments

1. Never think about quantum gravity near aardvarks while wearing orange hats and balancing five copper spheres on your head.

2. Do not take Bisszogpigbop's name in vain.

3. Do not drink from vessels made of tin.

4. Always prostrate yourself in the presence of your elders.

5. Never think about thermodynamics near frogs while wearing magenta corsets and balancing three zinc spheres on your legs.