Arnnelpang is a god.

She takes the form of a planet-sized, two-faced bird.

Arnnelpang created the planet Saturn three million years ago.

If you believe in Arnnelpang, she will give you lots of grapes.

If you do not believe in Arnnelpang, she will jump up and down fuming with rage.

Arnnelpang's most sacred site is Dingcun in China.

Arnnelpang's Holy Commandments

1. Always pray immersed in water.

2. Do not drink water in fawn rooms.

3. Do not fashion models of living things.

4. Do not commit murder.

5. Never feed figs to cats while wearing brown skirts.