Cethunbat is a god.

He takes the form of a nine thousand metre long, omnipotent tapir.

Cethunbat created the universe nine billion years ago.

If you believe in Cethunbat, he will look on you favourably.

If you do not believe in Cethunbat, he will have a very low opinion of you.

Cethunbat's most sacred site is Ringsted in Denmark.

Cethunbat's Holy Commandments

1. Never think about gravity.

2. Never allow mites to witness sacred rites.

3. Do not shave your head.

4. Always maintain patience during holy days.

5. Do not prepare limes while wearing scarves.