Tofganquag is a god.

He takes the form of a thin, sapient wyrm.

Tofganquag created energy eight trillion years ago.

If you believe in Tofganquag, he will smite all your enemies.

If you do not believe in Tofganquag, he will turn you into a goat.

Tofganquag's most sacred site is Dornbock in Germany.

Tofganquag's Holy Commandments

1. You must never eat turnips.

2. Radishes are unclean and should not be eaten.

3. Always store onions above ground.

4. Always help shrews.

5. Do not dye your hair yellow.