Dapflabnurt is a god.

She takes the form of an extremely heavy, unthoughtful mink.

Dapflabnurt created energy eight quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Dapflabnurt, she will be surprised.

If you do not believe in Dapflabnurt, she will jump up and down fuming with anger.

Dapflabnurt's most sacred site is Panormos in Greece.

Dapflabnurt's Holy Commandments

1. You must love Dapflabnurt.

2. Hide if five porpoises approach from the west.

3. Otters are unholy and should not be approached.

4. Always count to eight before sleeping.

5. Do not speak of ultrasonics near sacred fires.