Shavrowbonk is a god.

It takes the form of a plump, able donkey.

Shavrowbonk created vertebrates nine quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Shavrowbonk, it will look after your home planet.

If you do not believe in Shavrowbonk, it will send twenty two thousand, three hundred, and seventy eight badgers to sort you out.

Shavrowbonk's most sacred site is Troms in Norway.

Shavrowbonk's Holy Commandments

1. Do not hurt snakes.

2. Never run near voles.

3. Do not wear titanium on your body.

4. Never paint your legs purple.

5. Hide if five horses approach from the east.