Timabstik is a god.

It takes the form of a four hundred metre long, deceitful penguin.

Timabstik created oxygen two thousand years ago.

If you believe in Timabstik, it will grant your every wish.

If you do not believe in Timabstik, it will destroy your home planet.

Timabstik's most sacred site is Nanjie in China.

Timabstik's Holy Commandments

1. Never wear skirts.

2. Never talk about hamsters.

3. Never feed lots of rice to badgers while wearing blue shirts.

4. Respect rivers and do not attempt to bridge them.

5. Never look at dwarf planets.