Suglabrat is a god.

She takes the form of a giant, impressive jaguar.

Suglabrat created tapeworms seven trillion years ago.

If you believe in Suglabrat, she will make you immortal.

If you do not believe in Suglabrat, she will sneak up behind you and tap you on the back.

Suglabrat's most sacred site is Khwee in Botswana.

Suglabrat's Holy Commandments

1. Always cleanse ash with water.

2. Never write about nebulae.

3. Never gather nine frogs near doors.

4. Never play with disobedient children.

5. Never chant while facing east.