Artpogsid Dossbotcet is a god.

She takes the form of an exceedingly large, humorless jellyfish.

Artpogsid Dossbotcet created the cosmos nine billion years ago.

If you believe in Artpogsid Dossbotcet, she will visit you to thank you.

If you do not believe in Artpogsid Dossbotcet, she will remove you from existence.

Artpogsid Dossbotcet's most sacred site is Tatul in Bulgaria.

Artpogsid Dossbotcet's Holy Commandments

1. You must pray to Artpogsid Dossbotcet four times a day.

2. Always look after injured geese.

3. Always help frogs.

4. Retreat if five gulls approach from the west.

5. Your grandchildren must be taught to worship Artpogsid Dossbotcet.