Dudrulvil Kadhoncan is a god.

He takes the form of a six thousand metre long, egotistical swallow.

Dudrulvil Kadhoncan created the planet Earth three billion years ago.

If you believe in Dudrulvil Kadhoncan, he will grant you three wishes.

If you do not believe in Dudrulvil Kadhoncan, he will think nothing of it.

Dudrulvil Kadhoncan's most sacred site is Sarti in Greece.

Dudrulvil Kadhoncan's Holy Commandments

1. Never think about ultrasonics near doves while wearing cyan shirts and balancing six carbon spheres on your arms.

2. Retreat if five aardvarks approach from the south.

3. Do not hurt porpoises.

4. Never write about galaxies.

5. Do not shave your face.