Lipyogjan is a god.

She takes the form of a five thousand metre long, unselfish salamander.

Lipyogjan created the Tadpole Galaxy six quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Lipyogjan, she will ignore you forever.

If you do not believe in Lipyogjan, she will send four elephants to rub you out.

Lipyogjan's most sacred site is Dimson in England.

Lipyogjan's Holy Commandments

1. Hide if eight nematodes approach from the west.

2. Permit no heathen within the settlement walls.

3. Always pray immersed in water.

4. Look mercifully on unfortunate horses.

5. Never talk about quantum mechanics near great tits while wearing cyan skirts and balancing four silicon spheres on your head.