Pidkomont is a god.

It takes the form of a three thousand metre long, capable seal.

Pidkomont created a top quark seven trillion years ago.

If you believe in Pidkomont, it will remain indifferent to you.

If you do not believe in Pidkomont, it will curse you and those you beget for fifty two trillion years.

Pidkomont's most sacred site is Dingcun in China.

Pidkomont's Holy Commandments

1. Permit no heathen within the settlement walls.

2. Never think about enzymes.

3. Frogs are unholy and should not be approached.

4. Do not covet oxen.

5. Never talk about the weak nuclear force near grasshopers while wearing magenta boots and balancing six lead spheres on your hands.