Canrancam is a god.

She takes the form of a three hundred metre long, dishonest octopus.

Canrancam created the Whirlpool Galaxy twelve years ago.

If you believe in Canrancam, she will make you immortal.

If you do not believe in Canrancam, she will turn you into a tree.

Canrancam's most sacred site is Thethampakkam in India.

Canrancam's Holy Commandments

1. Never feed cherries to bats while wearing indigo hats.

2. Never talk about special relativity near snakes while wearing mauve dresses and balancing nine carbon spheres on your back.

3. Always treat voles with great respect.

4. Always wash your head before prayer.

5. Respect rivers and do not attempt to bridge them.