Canxenmeggiggom is a god.

She takes the form of a seven thousand metre long, competent monkey.

Canxenmeggiggom created Mount Everest eight quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Canxenmeggiggom, she will be very happy.

If you do not believe in Canxenmeggiggom, she will destroy your home galaxy.

Canxenmeggiggom's most sacred site is Oppin in Germany.

Canxenmeggiggom's Holy Commandments

1. Never talk about quantum mechanics.

2. Always look both ways before crossing roads.

3. Do not take Canxenmeggiggom's name in vain.

4. Never mention mice.

5. Do not imbibe mustard, for it is unholy.