Stanbimkam is a god.

He takes the form of a seven thousand metre long, kind goose.

Stanbimkam created a Higgs boson two years ago.

If you believe in Stanbimkam, he will ignore you forever.

If you do not believe in Stanbimkam, he will turn you into a frog.

Stanbimkam's most sacred site is Hej in Sweden.

Stanbimkam's Holy Commandments

1. Never talk about seals.

2. Stanbimkam loves porpoises, so they must be respected.

3. Do not utter prayers while touching silicon.

4. Do not prepare beans while wearing shoes.

5. Always help sick goats.