Nelmisquart Bamquim is a god.

It takes the form of an extremely small, awe-inspiring dingo.

Nelmisquart Bamquim created parasitic wasps five thousand years ago.

If you believe in Nelmisquart Bamquim, it will give you a massive pile of rare-earth elements.

If you do not believe in Nelmisquart Bamquim, it will destroy your favourite galaxy.

Nelmisquart Bamquim's most sacred site is Thimmanaickenpalayam in India.

Nelmisquart Bamquim's Holy Commandments

1. Always help sick manatees.

2. Never allow dogs to sleep beneath your roof.

3. Do not utter prayers while touching gold.

4. Always store cherries above ground.

5. Do not chop down trees.