Vanbednuttdussbastcemquaf is a god.

He takes the form of a slim, fast shark.

Vanbednuttdussbastcemquaf created the Cigar Galaxy nine quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Vanbednuttdussbastcemquaf, he will celebrate by creating some planets.

If you do not believe in Vanbednuttdussbastcemquaf, he will turn you into a mouse.

Vanbednuttdussbastcemquaf's most sacred site is Altata in Mexico.

Vanbednuttdussbastcemquaf's Holy Commandments

1. Do not eat bread.

2. Always obey Vanbednuttdussbastcemquaf's priests.

3. Do not take Vanbednuttdussbastcemquaf's name in vain.

4. Always make a point of helping unfortunate bats.

5. Do not trade with those who eat apples.