Nartjinlarnnullcitget is a god.

He takes the form of an eight thousand metre long, stupid goose.

Nartjinlarnnullcitget created the Milkyway four billion years ago.

If you believe in Nartjinlarnnullcitget, he will give you a massive pile of rare-earth elements.

If you do not believe in Nartjinlarnnullcitget, he will name a particularly small and pointless comet after you.

Nartjinlarnnullcitget's most sacred site is Pedraza in Spain.

Nartjinlarnnullcitget's Holy Commandments

1. Do not shave your head.

2. Do not commit murder.

3. Never paint your face yellow.

4. Erect eight zinc sculptures of Nartjinlarnnullcitget on top of important buildings.

5. Erect a giant titanium sculpture of Nartjinlarnnullcitget in the centre of the settlement.